Daily Archives: November 8, 2010

Stig Farm revealed

Top Gear aren’t only busy suing the old Stig, but frantically searching for a new one as well. Or a creative idea, actually. This video was released as a decoy, to disguise the fact that they’re completely unable to come up with something new.

Very funny, Clarkson.

Fans, don’t be fooled. The new Stig will be a bloke in a white suit. His identity will be a secret. All will be revealed in about three years’ time. Top Gear will sue the newly outed Stig’s pants off. Etcetera, ad nauseam.

Move on, people. Nothing to see here.

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Putin is having some fun

'Whatever you do, Mr Prime Minister, do NOT push the red button'

It seems he likes manly pursuits, as he calls them. So I told my old friend Gerard Lopez he might score some brownie points by having Mr Prime Minister drive on of his race cars. Gerard didn’t hesitate a second. He expects most of his sponsor money to come from Russia, so this was a no-brainer.

It was for Vladimir Putin too. Except for one thing: if he goes out for a drive he insists on having a spare car right behind him, in case the first one breaks down. Something to do with the state of automotive Russia. Don’t ask.

So Gerard brought two cars to St Petersburg, and Putin had his bit of fun on a stretch of road that just happened to be deserted. Coincidence, no doubt. Or maybe it was empty because it was early in the morning, before the rush hour.

Or maybe it was because there were a couple of hundred traffic policemen armed with tanks and automatic weapons. This might be a good solution for the M25 on Monday mornings.

Button seen leaving Interlagos circuit

He asked what would be the safest way. Told me he had enough aggravation for one weekend and didn’t feel like running any more risks of getting either mugged or interviewed.

And since I needed the helicopter myself, what else could I advise him?.

I’m sorry, Jenson. I really am.

Jenson Button shaken, but not stirred

Really, sometimes I can’t help myself. And it often happens when some journo asks me a stupid question. (I know, I know, that sounds redundant, doesn’t it?)

So here’s this Reuters bloke who wants to know what I think of Jenson Button being mugged outside Interlagos. What do I think? I mean, the story’s simple, isn’t it?

Jenson’s being driven around with his entourage in armoured Merc. Merc gets stuck in traffic. Armed hoodlums pour out of nearby apartment block. Driver of said Merc has had some training in evasive driving. Driver spots hoodlums and has time of his life. Finally some real life evasive driving! Driver evasive drives Jenson and entourage to hotel. Rams several cars in the process. After all, it was only one afternoon of evasive driving school. Hoodlums decide this is too difficult and don’t pursue. Owners of damaged cars do pursue. Of course they do. They need Jenson’s details for the insurance claims. The end.

All in all this is about as exciting as watching the Bahrain Grand Prix. But the Reuters hack sees world headlines. Maybe even Continue reading